How I keep my mind and life Positive

A blog by our very own Vic

In my previous life I worked in IT. It’s a job and career path that I fell into in my first full time job. It was never a career I chose but one that I was good at and I just progressed up the ladder over the years. IT is a funny world for a woman to work in, a hugely male dominated world where I felt pressure to over perform to prove my worth in this masculine workplace. Which of course I did, and I kicked arse! However, a few years back I was working for a transport company that required out of hours upgrades and supports. Being part of a team of 5 but 3 people short meant that I ended up doing most of the out of hours work. After approximately 8 months of working 70-80 hour weeks and getting woken up multiple times every night, I had a breakdown. It was def one of the darkest chapters in my life. I have never cried so much. I have never slept so much. I have never done so little. I barely moved from the sofa for 2 months. And when I did leave the house I had panic and anxiety attacks, neither of which I had ever experienced before.

I started doing a lot of self work with a number of incredible teachers, including one who is writing next weeks blog on Spiritual Positivity, Gail Evans. It was also during this time that I decided to start practicing different techniques to keep my mind positive and therefore my life. I am not an expert, but these are the tips that I have used since this time and continue to use on a daily basis.

This is what the focus of this weeks positivity blog is. Keeping your mind positive and allowing your life to bloom with true happiness as a result.

There are a number of things that I believe passionately have helped me to keep my mind and life positive. Even with the craziness of the last year I have managed to maintain a level of joy and gratitude.

Hopefully you will find this helpful to you on your positivity journey.

Living a Life filled with Gratitude

I first read the Secret about 10 years ago and it’s a practice that I have been aware of for some time. But it took one of my favourite American coaches, Tony Robbins, at one of his live events to really cement its importance to me. At a Tony Robbins Unleash the Power Within event he said –

When you are living in a state of gratitude you can’t feel any other emotion. If you are feeling gratitude you can’t be stressed, or angry, or upset or any other negative emotion. All you can feel is grateful.

So I practice a life of gratitude every single day. And for the most part he is absolutely correct, gratitude is the most powerful emotion.

Your morning sets the tone for your day. So, for me positivity starts as soon as I wake up.

imagine lockdown with no internet – crazy!). And of course, all these things don’t even include times with loved ones, a cat purring on your lap, a spring flower coming out in bloom, a new song from your favourite artist, your favourite meal, hot water (come on, aren’t hot showers in the morning such a blessing). You can see that while 10 things a day might seem like a long list to write it really isn’t once you start breaking it down and thinking about all the incredible things, we all have to be grateful for.

I like to sandwich my day between two slices of positivity so at the end of the day I take my same notebook and write down the best thing that has happened to me that day. The thing that I am most grateful for. Looking for gratitude in everything will bring about a positive mindset like no other.

Being in the NOW

I mediate daily. Normally I meditate for around 10 to 15 minutes in the morning after doing my gratitude list and then for about 10 minutes before I go to sleep at night. But honestly if I am feeling overly stressed or tired, I go and take myself for a quick 5 minute meditation during the day. In lockdown 1 last year I was mediating a lot and in fact worked out that one day alone I had spent just over 2 and a quarter hours meditating. It’s such an amazing practice that really helps to ground and relax me causing me to focus on just being at one, being in that very moment. Because nothing else matters.

In this very moment you have everything that you need.

There is no such thing as original thought, everything that you think and that I think has been thought many times before probably by many possibly thousands of people. If the thought you have does not serve you, merely observe it, recognise it and release it, as not your thought. Is there meaning behind this thought, sometimes these thoughts can point to areas of your life that you may need to do some work on and release.

I think with thoughts its also the words that we use internally and externally that have such power to them. If you find yourself thinking or saying a negative word, like I am angry, could this be replaced by a more positive word? Instead of angry, you could say I am in a place of being able to share some forgiveness or this is a challenging situation that will help me grow. Words have power and the ones we use have power over us.

With the words that we use its also important that these words we use to talk about ourselves are only positive and empowering words. If you tell yourself frequently enough that you are not intelligent you will start to believe it. Equally if you start to tell yourself how intelligent you are your actions will start to align with this belief.

There is a technique that you can use to remove any negativity called tapping, also know as EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) that has been proven to effectively resolve a wide range of issues and limiting beliefs. This is a technique that I frequently use and for me it is incredibly effective. If this is something that you would like to look into I highly recommend that you start on YouTube watching tapping videos by Brad Yates, he has been filming tapping videos for years and has a huge library that you can follow.

Finally, the last thing I would recommend in keeping your mind and life positive is doing something that brings you pure unadulterated joy every day. This really could be anything. A walk in nature. A dance round the kitchen to your favourite song. A chat on the phone to a good friend. Or a cuddle up on the sofa with your partner. Or maybe just a long soak in the bath with the door shut, some good music and a face mask. Just bring joy into your life.

There have been studies done that have found that positive thinking helps you live longer, reduces loneliness and increases the quality of your life. But it is a journey. Don’t expect to decide to live positively and for it to just happen overnight. It takes time and patience. For me it’s a journey that I will be on every day for the rest of my life. Learning more and practicing more and learning new techniques all the time. If you find yourself in a negative spiral, try and catch it as soon as you can.

Don’t be hard on yourself. This is a journey.

Small steps are still steps in the right direction.

Further reading and resources that can help…

Books

The power of now by Eckhart Tolle

Miracle morning by Hal Elrod

Anything by Rhonda Byrne – but start with ‘The Secret’ if you haven’t read any of her books.

The Power of the peaceful warrior by Dan Millman

Anything by Tony Robbins

Videos & Films

I am not your guru – Tony Robbins on Netflix

The Secret – on Netflix – this is quite an old film and hasn’t aged that well but its well worth a watch.

Brad Yates Tapping on Youtube

Apps

Insight timer app which has loads of meditations and courses that you can do.

ThinkUp – The most suggestive phase of the mind is when we are falling asleep and for this reason it’s the best time to listen to positive affirmations. On ThinkUp you can record affirmations in your own voice, which are received better in this low frequency state of your mind. Your mind will hear them as you saying them. They have suggested affirmations that you can record or you can make up your own. You can add some background music to it. You can set it on a timer so it will just repeat as you fall asleep.